My daughter is growing up fast and will soon be asking him herself where her dad is. Wait until the shoe is on the other foot then brag on how wonderful they are! Be a real parent. I was a stay at home mom at his request for 10 years. God bless us all. You can obviously tell who the feminist women are on here. And if the non-custodial parent is legitimately having a hard time with payment but shows good faith and tries to work something out, to me, that counts. What should we do? I've seen him with his father. Many NCP are having to spend thousands just to remain in the kids' lives (and all the other parent does is complain about needing *more* money!) I don't know what to do or who to turn to and I'm really just feeling screwed over and left behind and as worthless as I am. In cases where a parent is seriously behind on child support, the courts may order his wages garnished and he may lose his driver's or professional licenses. My ex, after a year of having my son, is asking me for money per week now for my son. My husband has taken my kids as his own and loves them just as much as our four year old son. He gives it to his wife and she takes her kids shopping while my kids don't get anything. Lets see: I am divorced have been for years. Find out more about child maintenance. He never pays on time and it has become a real problem cause I depend on that money since we are living under the poverty line and he is living the high life with his new wife and children that aren't biologically his. Now my son, who has been working since he was 14 is buying dinners for his dad, stepmom and three youngest siblings in that family. When you're married and you have a kid, the state has no problem hooking you up with a crapload of programs, but the state takes a different approach if you're not together. I tried in court to get custody of my daughter during the divorce (that was an exercise in futility. he takes off work for 3 and 4 weeks at a time and he is letting his wife tell him what he needs to do. the judge ordered him to pay me $1,000 a month for our kids. I'm so damn tired and I don't even know where to look for help. If someone makes 1200 a month and has to pay 500 a month, how the heck do they afford to have a roof over their heads? As an added she was denied lowering in one court and another refused to hear her case. 133: I could not have said it any better. "Dear father who won’t pay child support, you’re useless and I don’t know how you live with yourself. Please don't whinge about how unfair it is to the noncustodial parent living in a one room apartment. So to those of you calling mothers/fathers selfish when they spend their lives raising their children, your ignorance is disturbing and you should keep your mouths shut. Saying that if the woman can't support a child then they shouldn't have one is an ignorant and spiteful thing to say. I think the other parent should have to pay child support. You are missing out on what would have been probably the best experience of your life regardless of how you and your baby mama got along. You are just as ignorant for throwing all women in the same boat and just as bad as the women who man bash and think that all dads are dead beats. To compound matters, the Family Responsibility Office has issued me a Summons to attend court for non payment of support for September! He has been behind for most of that time. Non Custodial parent going back to school he is going to need loans. You have options if your child’s father is disobeying a child support order. She was ordered to pay child support five years ago. We didn't even have enough gas money last week and my church had to pay our electric bill! I don't know what the outcomes will be, but I hope the court is just. Have you ever thought about the children who have had to live their lives without knowing their father/mother and wondering why they aren't helping? He is behind in child support by 50,000. You gain nothing and the you or the kids suffer even more just trying to prove a point. When I got help from their dad, I appreciated it. So, all you people out there wanting to know how it's done, here is a quick list. Ladies can be deadbeats too. Nothing is ever done to this woman to make her help support her children. I am a firm believer in child support. where's my justice? Ex won't pay child support . I am a divorced mother of two. taking care of the child on her own? I will, however, be looking into back child support to help augment the expenses for her schooling. It makes me sick. He wouldn't even clean up after himself, much less the kids. We understand that your child’s needs can’t wait, so we’ll move quickly to learn about your situation and find a legal solution that meets your unique needs. We have a daughter of our own now and he's an excellent father. And when he quits jobs, he will call me and in a very evil tone, he will say, "by the way, you aren't getting my money for a while. For those who think they can, well, good luck to you all. Then after bringing the mother to court for abandonment and abuse she caused to our child I was awarded full custody and child support. Then he takes care of it and never has to give any money to her directly. I got stuck paying him 200 a week and you know what he does with it? He spends a great deal of money on the girls and has previously opened up bank accounts in their names. He is still is expected to pay the ordered amount of child support. Sarah M(4637) Posted on 06-04-2018 at 10.49AM . Evil just covers this earth like a sickness so thick I can't even see. It's so immature and childish! Child support causes more dads to take their own lives than any other thing because they cannot feed themselves and pay child support, too. I work as a cna and there are several women that I work with that take care of their own. i have to stay in a 2 bedroom trailer because of how the courts are run. If you have a child or children, help pay for them without complaint! The child does not magically become not yours. I called him every day for almost four years, picked him up on the weekends, and kept him during summers and many holidays. It's very pathetic that a father with an average salary jog cannot even afford a small apartment because of child support payments. If she had played fair in the beginning, instead of going along with her jerk of a friend and all the hardcore feminuts she hangs around with, then there would have been no issues with paying full support based on the regular tables set by the government and she wouldn't even need the FRO (Family Responsibility Office) in Ontario to collect it. She does not answer her phone or the door, apparently, as agencies have attempted calling her and serving her papers but she is still in locating status. At first I resented this, but quickly realized civility had to be maintained for the welfare of my kids. Later on, I gave his father another chance to be in my son's life. Her not working and not providing a home for the child should be viewed as not being a responsible parent. Monthly child support payments can be a financial life saver after a divorce, especially if you earn far less than your husband. I will not pay child support to the mother if she will not in turn allow me to be part if his life. What about the custodial mother who is homeless with her four kids? I am a single mom of three daughters. I feel so bad for my mom because she's always working and we can barely afford much of anything. Daddy was a big baby so you'll have to do without. it should be her problem because she is the one who left my husband before because she keeps on partying and not taking care of the kid and now she asks for child support. And on a side note, my husband's child's mother was one of them who "cried" wolf--- and yes it does seem that there are a lot that do this but there are some who are legit and are similar to my case. I was a victim of a psychotic ex who was abusive to both myself and my 3 children. I think the way they set the child support is stupid. This went on for nine months. He started letting his wife deal with every arrangement, from transportation to money. The Child Support Enforcement Act of 1984 allows district attorneys to help you collect court-ordered child support from a parent who refuses to pay. Protect Father's rights. He has been paying $600 a month for a long time. My children are basically 19, 18, 17, and 13. When two people decide to have sex they are in an agreement that if a child comes to be then the responsibility is 50/50. To ladies who are defending their men: A few major things to consider: You are "with" the men, meaning sleeping with them and catering to them. I foolishly thought it would be good for the kids. I have never asked the kids about their visits but now they refuse to see or talk to her. mental ex girlfriend). Or just learn to keep it in your pants, or use your own hand and a sock! Bottom line: you are stealing from your children and not giving them all that they deserve. Deadbeats love to put the blame on others. The mother -- sorry, the carrier of my children -- refuses to pay child support and the courts refuse to push action against her. If a child is born and the parents choose to not be together the parent that does not have the child full time should expect to pay at least 25 percent of their income to the other parent until the child becomes emancipated or deceased. Her mom walked out for no reason when she was five and had a double ear infection. I don't have education or a career, but I'm a hell of a loving father who wants to be there every day for my child. doesn’t pay child maintenance. In the meantime, I am advised to apply for aid programs and utilize the food pantry if I need assistance. He called in on the day the money was due and they gave him one more chance (again). He promised to give me money from a job he did but then all of a sudden he didn't have any money cause he didn't get to do the job. He doesn't have a car and apparently nobody, not his mom, dad, sister, or brother can ever drop him off to look for one. To schedule your initial consultation, please call our Charlotte office toll-free at 1-888-376-ATTY (2889) or contact us using our online contact form. He didn't make sure we had anything. Family is family. I'm now homeless, unemployable, have little cash and will eventually end up in the streets or in the bush! I am struggling, working a third shift job to support myself and my kids. They both have part time jobs but with this economy, just gas alone is killing their paychecks! I, on the other hand, could not afford one and had to do what I could with legal aid and every second of my spare time. She repeatedly says she won't work and that he has to support her and the kids. he has no educational background, and it's all about him. And she thought she could decide how much child support I got? I have to pay all expenses: rent, utilities, etc., and he pays for 1/2 of things like haircuts, insurance and small things. The federal government takes issue with parents who attempt to work the system and avoid child support payments. The mother of the children was a real "witch" and always using the children to hurt him. Oh, and he might have to get a roommate (his new girlfriend). If you're not responsible enough to make arrangements out of court, why did you have a child together in the first place. These schemes used to be managed by the Child Support Agency. Why should a child go without if his father can support him? Thank goodness the prosecutor's office saw fit to do their job. I am 17, and my ex boyfriend is 18. I am not going to be one of those mothers that is whiny. It's a lot easier for someone who does not have kids living with them to find employment. Mothers are awarded sole custody for a reason. To compound matters, I have just had my license suspended which cost me my regional line haul job, which doesn't pay great. I want to change this law that allows him to pay a minimum amount without any consequences. That is considered neglect and abuse. Will he go to jail? I have read all the posts here and my son's dad lives and resides in Australia. He's kept a good career-type job for several years now. Most noncustodial fathers aren't left with enough to pay their own rent. After all this time I finally filed for child support. I'm only 23 years old single mom of a wonderful year old boy. Nothing like that. We have lived in northern alberta for 12 years. Financially, I am just keeping myself and daughter above water. God help us all. I was also laid off in the same month I was divorced. I eventually figured out that she was deliberately scamming Revenue Canada by claiming she was a single mom and having my children falsely declared OCD or PTSD with the Children's Aid in Brantford aiding and abetting in her favor. Get a job! The girl knew we got married and didn't ask for child support until she found out we are going to have our own baby, too. It's not all about the money, but the emotional and understanding that parents should have towards the other. Notice the "we aren't together so I shouldn't pay" attitudes. I don't understand people who condone deadbeats. I gave him the house (after being told he would buy my half out), and only took support for one child-- because he was taking on all the marital debt and within two years we would modify the support to include all four children. However, some parents believe they don't have to support their children. I love my uncle to death; but I still think it's selfish to take care of yourself and not your children. The father of my two daughters almost never paid child support. Everyone needs to live. Statistically, non-custodial women are less likely to pay than men. How sick is that really, if you think about it? "I can't find a job;" "I lost my job;" "I can't pay that much.". Filing for child support for me wasn't just about the money. ... We should never let a father’s inability to pay child support eclipse the other ways he can fulfill his nurturing role. Because she cheated on me and I feel the other man should now shoulder the financial burden of paying for our child. I am more of a nurturer than their mother is. You may still need to pay some child support if you have a higher income than the other parent. Pay child support but mother won't let father see child. Once when she was 3.5 weeks old, another time when we got the DNA test, she was 5 months old. #61: Why do "us women" need to be careful? It was his idea to go to court, but somehow I'm going after his money. "yes virginia there are real deadbeat dads." And yes, I did go and beg for help. Now is she a gold digger? Those of you who are complaining about the "deadbeat dads" need to realize that there are many deadbeat dads. Now that he is out of prison and off probation he has stopped paying it again. Either you, as the recipient of the support payments, or the Friend of the Court can file a petition for an order to show cause for the failure to pay support. This is not about the mother or the father. I always pay my support to my ex wife and she is constantly complaining she wants more money from me. OK first off, for someone to say that women who seek child support are just lazy, don't want to work and are looking for a way to make the "father" pay, that could not be any further from the truth! What if you were the one he was not paying, how would you feel? Stop judging the mothers receiving support. My ex wife and i were married less than 3 years and we divorced in 2004. When I told him that I pay R1000.00 for her per month (R400-school fees; R300-school transport & R300- welfare at my mother's house). My theory is I feel the state knows a woman is less likely to pay than a man and usually makes less money. to all you women, you'd better be careful. It takes two people to make a child and it takes those same two people to provide support for their children. I'm really at my wit's end with the whole thing. Do not grow up and keep on picking fights. Now her two-month-old is getting taken from her for drug abuse! What could/can happen to us in this situation? Hopefully by then, your ex will go to court to force you let them see your child. That's how it should be, right? I don't care if you make $6/hour or $60/hour; you should be helping feed, clothe and take care of your child, period! I was awarded a measly $300 a month, which didn't cover child care expenses while I worked. I do just fine without him or his money. 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